BREAKING NEWS: Sex of J. Money Baby #2 Revealed

BUDGETVILLE, Va. (AP) –– It was a cold, wintery day outside the perinatologist yesterday, but for the Money family it couldn’t have been sunnier. With a few squirts of jelly and rubbing of a wand, the sonogram had painted a perfect discovery:

IT’S GOING TO BE A BOY!!!

And no sooner did the twig and respective berries show up, than did waves of happiness and smiles across the Moneys’ faces. True, they were kind of hoping to even the sides a bit with a female addition to the family, but one cannot ask for anything more than a perfectly healthy little angel.

Said Jay, upon receiving the news:

“A boy! Awesome! Now Lil’ Money will have a playmate to wrestle around! Time to get those little footballs ready, my Redskins need all the help they can get…”

To which Mrs. Money replied,

“Football? Really?” (rolls eyes) “I’m just so glad he’s healthy and coming along nicely. I think I can feel him wiggle now!”

And with that, the Moneys sped off in their dope-ass cadillac safely left the building in their economical Toyota, and hit the nearest Panera Bread to celebrate.

They look forward to sharing future updates as their boy continues to grow, and are now accepting bids to publish his first pictures.

###

For more information on the picture rights, contact J. Money @ 555-CHA-CHING
For more information on this breaking news, or to congratulate the family, leave a comment below


Associated Press writer Budget McBudgetson contributed to this report.

Β© 2013 The Associated J$ Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. Unless you say Pretty Please.

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66 Comments

  1. Martin December 17, 2013 at 5:23 AM

    Congrats! I have two little brothers. Speaking from experience, it’s a ton of fun!

  2. miranda@beyondworklifebalance December 17, 2013 at 5:45 AM

    Fantastic. Congratulations!

  3. Liquid December 17, 2013 at 6:39 AM

    Great news :) Congrats. I don’t have any siblings but I think having a brother would be a lot of fun. Also, parents can save some money on clothes because hand-me-downs :D

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 8:07 AM

      That’s what my wife mentioned pretty quick too :) Works for me!

  4. Alicia @ Financial Diffraction December 17, 2013 at 6:53 AM

    Woo. Happy healthy baby! Loved the breaking news template :)

  5. Mark Ross December 17, 2013 at 7:21 AM

    Congrats! Good luck on the new baby boy J!

  6. Travis @debtchronicles December 17, 2013 at 7:48 AM

    Congrats, J – exciting time as your Moneys grow! (see what I did there?)

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:18 PM

      Haha… zing!

  7. Matt Becker December 17, 2013 at 7:57 AM

    Congrats man! We just had our second son 8 days ago and it’s been a blast so far. A little hectic for sure but a lot of fun. Watching the boys figure out how to play together is going to be awesome.

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 8:07 AM

      Cool! Congrats!

  8. John S @ Frugal Rules December 17, 2013 at 8:03 AM

    That’s awesome J! Health is, of course, the most important but having two boys is awesome. Ours definitely keep our hands full! Congrats!

  9. Anne @ Unique Gifter December 17, 2013 at 8:11 AM

    Hehehe. Congratulations!! Awesome write up, too.

  10. Laurie @thefrugalfarmer December 17, 2013 at 8:12 AM

    Huge congrats, Money family!!! Our son was followed by three girls. I’ll never forget the day when I was changing his teeny little diaper and our youngest daughter looked at the twig and berries and said, astonished and somewhat frightened “What IS that???” :-)

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:19 PM

      Hahahhahaha.hahhahhahahhaa

      hahha haha

      hahahhahahhaha

  11. Kathy December 17, 2013 at 8:14 AM

    Congratulations! I have one son and I can honestly say it was a privilege to raise him into the young man he is today. What a blessing!

  12. j. December 17, 2013 at 8:19 AM

    Congrats! Happy for you and the family!

  13. Brian@ Debt Discipline December 17, 2013 at 8:22 AM

    Congrats! We have 3 children. 2 sons and a daughter! The love and teasing they share between one another is priceless. Brothers rock!

  14. theresa gianna December 17, 2013 at 8:29 AM

    congratulations!

  15. Ben @ The Wealth Gospel December 17, 2013 at 8:30 AM

    Congrats man! Just three more and you’ll have a basketball team ;)

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:20 PM

      Don’t tempt me ;)

      1. Ben @ The Wealth Gospel December 17, 2013 at 4:22 PM

        It’s either that or you shoot for 11 :) Just make sure to name three of them Kareem, Abdul and Jabbar and they’ll be set for life!

  16. Mrs. Money December 17, 2013 at 8:45 AM

    Congrats!! How exciting! So glad the baby is healthy and perfect. It’s so awesome to have brothers!

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:31 PM

      Thank you friend! For all the tweets and thoughts too you’ve been sending over – means a lot :)

  17. Jay December 17, 2013 at 9:28 AM

    Congratulations!

  18. Pauline December 17, 2013 at 9:37 AM

    That is fantastic news! I hope they become best friends. The dad is the one setting the sex so you’ll have to work on your girl making skills next time :)

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:20 PM

      I have no problem practicing :)

      1. Pauline December 19, 2013 at 9:56 AM

        The good news is instead of naming her Penny you can now name him Benjamin!

        1. J. Money December 19, 2013 at 10:03 AM

          We just may!

  19. a terrible husband... December 17, 2013 at 9:39 AM

    Congratulations! Looks like a “toilet seat up” household for the foreseeable future. Because with a 3-1 ratio it’s way more efficient to just keep them up.

    If you have multiple toilets you could always designate one the “ladies room.”

    :)

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:21 PM

      HAH! That’s not a bad idea actually, walking over to tell my wife right now :)

  20. jestjack December 17, 2013 at 9:50 AM

    Congrats…Best Xmas present ever!

  21. Brit December 17, 2013 at 9:53 AM

    Congratulations!! Baby A has been the low cost one in our family. Thanks to big brother Z.

  22. This Life On Purpose December 17, 2013 at 9:55 AM

    Congrats to you both!

  23. Brian December 17, 2013 at 10:05 AM

    Congrats man!

    Not only can you do hand me downs, but you can legally make them live in the same room so you can rock a smaller house to save money. Plus they will have great stories from all their time togeather in their room like the first time they stayed up past midnight when tomorrow become today!

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:29 PM

      Yes! Good idea!!! Cuz this is seriously putting a cramp on my minimalism ;)

  24. Emily Hornburg December 17, 2013 at 10:58 AM

    Yay! I’m so excited for you guys!!!!!

  25. Teresa December 17, 2013 at 11:04 AM

    Congratulations on the healthy baby! :) how exciting!!!

  26. Broke Millennial December 17, 2013 at 11:05 AM

    Congrats on the healthy baby boy!

  27. Dave @ The New York Budget December 17, 2013 at 11:19 AM

    Congrats! A fellow Redskins fan as well. It has been a pretty rough 20+ years for us, but hopefully Lil’ Money 2 will be the answer!

    Speaking of which, have you thought of names? Here are some suggestions:

    Lil’ Money 2
    Notorious B.A.B.Y.
    J-Junior
    Lil’ Bills
    Saver Sav (Pronounced like Flavor Flav)
    $ (The Baby Formerly Known As [Insert Real Name])

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:30 PM

      Hah! “Notorious B.A.B.Y.” all the way man. Straight dope right there.

  28. Steve December 17, 2013 at 11:29 AM

    Congrats.

    In my experience, boys are way, way easier and much less expensive.

  29. Laura @ Richmond Savers December 17, 2013 at 11:30 AM

    Oh congratulations! Good luck bringing in a big bid for the opportunity to show of those first pictures ;)

  30. Christine @ ThePursuitofGreen December 17, 2013 at 11:40 AM

    Congratulations! That’s awesome news. So happy that baby 2 is healthy and well. Must be an awesome day for you and your whole family!

  31. Kaye December 17, 2013 at 11:53 AM

    Congrats on Baby Boy #2. And yes… that is definitely one of the cutest alien baby pics I’ve ever seen.

  32. Brittany December 17, 2013 at 12:07 PM

    Oh, god, I read that as “Respectable berries.” MOAR COFFEE NOW, BRITTANY.

    1. J. Money December 17, 2013 at 4:31 PM

      Hey, they could be respectable too? ;)

  33. Erin @ Red Debted Stepchild December 17, 2013 at 1:27 PM

    Yay! Congrats, J, that is so exciting :)

  34. Cait December 17, 2013 at 1:30 PM

    Two little men in the house? AND you!? The Mrs. is in big trouble. ;)

    Congrats to you guys! What a nice little piece of news to get before the holiday fun begins.

    1. J. Money December 18, 2013 at 3:58 PM

      You’re welcome to come over anytime and babysit :)

  35. liz December 17, 2013 at 2:10 PM

    congrats on baby boy! Two little boys sounds like fun :)

  36. Joe December 17, 2013 at 3:21 PM

    Congratulation! 2 boys… Man, it’s going to be nuts.

  37. Micro December 17, 2013 at 8:23 PM

    Congrats on the news. I will say though that sonogram bears an eerie similarity to Gieger’s Alien.

    1. J. Money December 18, 2013 at 3:58 PM

      Had to google that…. ICK!!

  38. Bobbi December 17, 2013 at 11:16 PM

    Congrats!

    We too found out today baby #2 is a boy. We were hoping for a girl but are happy with healthy.

    Here is to lil brothers!

    1. J. Money December 18, 2013 at 3:59 PM

      Awesome, congrats! Maybe they will be born on the same day :)

  39. Mark December 18, 2013 at 9:16 AM

    Congrats J Money!!

  40. Revanche December 18, 2013 at 2:04 PM

    I miss reading for ONE day and I come back to find this! :) Congrats to you and Mrs!! And Baby Money who now has a built in sidekick ;)

    1. J. Money December 18, 2013 at 3:59 PM

      Haha… I’m a mover and shaker, what can I tell ya?

  41. Teri January 28, 2014 at 5:24 PM

    Awesome! Congratulations! Now you own your own football team! Go “Little Moneys”!

    1. J. Money January 28, 2014 at 6:31 PM

      Haha… or at least join the best football team ever, The Redskins ;)

      1. Teri January 28, 2014 at 7:19 PM

        OR 2 football scholarships worth at least $300k!

        1. J. Money January 28, 2014 at 7:55 PM

          I’d be okay with that :)