BUDGETVILLE, Va. (AP) –– It was a cold, wintery day outside the perinatologist yesterday, but for the Money family it couldn’t have been sunnier. With a few squirts of jelly and rubbing of a wand, the sonogram had painted a perfect discovery:
IT’S GOING TO BE A BOY!!!
And no sooner did the twig and respective berries show up, than did waves of happiness and smiles across the Moneys’ faces. True, they were kind of hoping to even the sides a bit with a female addition to the family, but one cannot ask for anything more than a perfectly healthy little angel.
Said Jay, upon receiving the news:
“A boy! Awesome! Now Lil’ Money will have a playmate to wrestle around! Time to get those little footballs ready, my Redskins need all the help they can get…”
To which Mrs. Money replied,
“Football? Really?” (rolls eyes) “I’m just so glad he’s healthy and coming along nicely. I think I can feel him wiggle now!”
And with that, the Moneys
sped off in their dope-ass cadillac safely left the building in their economical Toyota, and hit the nearest Panera Bread to celebrate.
They look forward to sharing future updates as their boy continues to grow, and are now accepting bids to publish his first pictures.
For more information on the picture rights, contact J. Money @ 555-CHA-CHING
For more information on this breaking news, or to congratulate the family, leave a comment below
Associated Press writer Budget McBudgetson contributed to this report.
© 2013 The Associated J$ Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. Unless you say Pretty Please.
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Congrats! I have two little brothers. Speaking from experience, it’s a ton of fun!
Great news :) Congrats. I don’t have any siblings but I think having a brother would be a lot of fun. Also, parents can save some money on clothes because hand-me-downs :D
That’s what my wife mentioned pretty quick too :) Works for me!
Woo. Happy healthy baby! Loved the breaking news template :)
Congrats! Good luck on the new baby boy J!
Congrats, J – exciting time as your Moneys grow! (see what I did there?)
Congrats man! We just had our second son 8 days ago and it’s been a blast so far. A little hectic for sure but a lot of fun. Watching the boys figure out how to play together is going to be awesome.
That’s awesome J! Health is, of course, the most important but having two boys is awesome. Ours definitely keep our hands full! Congrats!
Hehehe. Congratulations!! Awesome write up, too.
Huge congrats, Money family!!! Our son was followed by three girls. I’ll never forget the day when I was changing his teeny little diaper and our youngest daughter looked at the twig and berries and said, astonished and somewhat frightened “What IS that???” :-)
Congratulations! I have one son and I can honestly say it was a privilege to raise him into the young man he is today. What a blessing!
Congrats! Happy for you and the family!
Congrats! We have 3 children. 2 sons and a daughter! The love and teasing they share between one another is priceless. Brothers rock!
Congrats man! Just three more and you’ll have a basketball team ;)
Don’t tempt me ;)
It’s either that or you shoot for 11 :) Just make sure to name three of them Kareem, Abdul and Jabbar and they’ll be set for life!
Congrats!! How exciting! So glad the baby is healthy and perfect. It’s so awesome to have brothers!
Thank you friend! For all the tweets and thoughts too you’ve been sending over – means a lot :)
LOL! Congratulations! Glad the sun was shining where it doesn’t usually shine. :)
That is fantastic news! I hope they become best friends. The dad is the one setting the sex so you’ll have to work on your girl making skills next time :)
I have no problem practicing :)
The good news is instead of naming her Penny you can now name him Benjamin!
We just may!
Congratulations! Looks like a “toilet seat up” household for the foreseeable future. Because with a 3-1 ratio it’s way more efficient to just keep them up.
If you have multiple toilets you could always designate one the “ladies room.”
HAH! That’s not a bad idea actually, walking over to tell my wife right now :)
Congrats…Best Xmas present ever!
Congratulations!! Baby A has been the low cost one in our family. Thanks to big brother Z.
Congrats to you both!
Not only can you do hand me downs, but you can legally make them live in the same room so you can rock a smaller house to save money. Plus they will have great stories from all their time togeather in their room like the first time they stayed up past midnight when tomorrow become today!
Yes! Good idea!!! Cuz this is seriously putting a cramp on my minimalism ;)
Yay! I’m so excited for you guys!!!!!
Congratulations on the healthy baby! :) how exciting!!!
Congrats on the healthy baby boy!
Congrats! A fellow Redskins fan as well. It has been a pretty rough 20+ years for us, but hopefully Lil’ Money 2 will be the answer!
Speaking of which, have you thought of names? Here are some suggestions:
Lil’ Money 2
Saver Sav (Pronounced like Flavor Flav)
$ (The Baby Formerly Known As [Insert Real Name])
Hah! “Notorious B.A.B.Y.” all the way man. Straight dope right there.
In my experience, boys are way, way easier and much less expensive.
Oh congratulations! Good luck bringing in a big bid for the opportunity to show of those first pictures ;)
Congratulations! That’s awesome news. So happy that baby 2 is healthy and well. Must be an awesome day for you and your whole family!
Congrats on Baby Boy #2. And yes… that is definitely one of the cutest alien baby pics I’ve ever seen.
Oh, god, I read that as “Respectable berries.” MOAR COFFEE NOW, BRITTANY.
Hey, they could be respectable too? ;)
Yay!! Two little boys – how perfect!! So happy for your family!
Yay! Congrats, J, that is so exciting :)
Two little men in the house? AND you!? The Mrs. is in big trouble. ;)
Congrats to you guys! What a nice little piece of news to get before the holiday fun begins.
You’re welcome to come over anytime and babysit :)
congrats on baby boy! Two little boys sounds like fun :)
Congratulation! 2 boys… Man, it’s going to be nuts.
Congratulations! So exciting!
Congrats on the news. I will say though that sonogram bears an eerie similarity to Gieger’s Alien.
Had to google that…. ICK!!
We too found out today baby #2 is a boy. We were hoping for a girl but are happy with healthy.
Here is to lil brothers!
Awesome, congrats! Maybe they will be born on the same day :)
Congrats J Money!!
I miss reading for ONE day and I come back to find this! :) Congrats to you and Mrs!! And Baby Money who now has a built in sidekick ;)
Haha… I’m a mover and shaker, what can I tell ya?
Awesome! Congratulations! Now you own your own football team! Go “Little Moneys”!
Haha… or at least join the best football team ever, The Redskins ;)
OR 2 football scholarships worth at least $300k!
I’d be okay with that :)